Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Politics: The First Dog (Part II)

As the inauguration of our new president quickly approaches, the first family has been focusing on the most important matter, what will they get for their first dog? The options have been narrowed down to two, the Labradoodle, or the Portuguese Water Dog. We consider this such an important issue that we will give our recommendation a second time, with these revised options.

Maggie: I have met a few Labradoodles at our local dog park, and what a hoot those guys are! No seriously, I'm a lab mix myself and I have to wholly endorse any lab/poodle mix. Labradoodles seems to take on the best attributes of the two breeds, while simultaneously diluting out any genetic problems that might be compounded by inbreeding. They are excellent with children, loyal, easy to train, active, and lovable. Our Aunt Izzie is a relative of the Labradoodle, the Golden Doodle (A golden retriever/poodle mix), and she has an excellent temperment, great manners, and loves to play! These dogs don't shed, which would be a great plus for Malia's allergies. Portuguese Water Dogs need a lot of time and dedication to train them, or else they become destructive. The Obama family is sure to be quite distracted, and I don't want a doggie to destroy the White House and then the rest of us be punished by harsh anti-doggie legislation. I won't let it happen! As loyal as they are, a labradoodle puppy is sure to agree politically with the family, and then intelligently defend their positions to other doggies around the world. This is an excellent choice!

Sammi: What Maggie is not telling you is that Labradoodles are an unpredictable breed. The Obamas could end up with an excellent dog, or they could end up with an unholy terror; that's just the risk that you take mixing two very different breeds. I think that the Obamas should stick with the tried and true, the Portuguese Water Dog. Barack himself has a foreign background, and he would relate well to the Portuguese breed. These dogs are working dogs, great companions, easily trained, and enjoy being petted. A dog of this breed would be perfect for the Obamas, they could train it to pull things around the White House, and it would be content to sit, eagerly awaiting a command, through long meetings or cross-country flights. Also, that reflecting pool in front of the George Washington Monument would make an excellent swimming pool. Since the breed is great at learning and working, perhaps the puppy could pick up some secretarial or note-taking work around the office, saving the taxpayers from having to hire someone! Look at that face, how could you say no to it?!

Quick vote: Regardless of the breed that the Obamas finally settle on, what's really important is that there is a first dog to advocate for canine rights all over the country, and that said dog is a bitch!

No comments: