Advice: Moderation

This is Maggie here, Sammi is out for the day and I will tell you why. Yesterday, someone *cough* Daddy *cough* left the food bucket sitting out while they went to go shopping and Sammi bit open the bucket, allowing her to binge eat all she could and more (approximately 15 of her standard meals). Unfortunately, this is not the first time this has occurred.

So I am here to advise you, all of you, to stay away from binge eating! Sammi is currently laying on the floor underneath the swamp cooler whining pitifully (Which is driving me crazy, by the way.) and appears to be in a lot of pain. She will probably poop in the living room later, and then I will have to eat it up so our parents don't find out... Sigh, it's so hard to be an older sister to such a reckless puppy who never thinks of the consequences of her actions!

P.S. I google image searched "binge eating" and this picture is what came up. I thought it was funny.


Quick vote: Don't binge eat, for the love of everyone around you! That's right. Sammi has very aromatic farts right now!!!

Advice: Medical

We dogs have some insight for you, our faithful readers. We sure you have, as our parents oft have, traveled to the mystical doctor or even the hospital when you have a wound or sickness of some kind. What a waste!!! We recommend instead, licking whatever ails you, and it will heal in no time!

Recently, Sammi accidentally ran into a barbed wire fence, creating a silver-dollar sized wound that went as deep as her muscle! Our parents took her in to the evil vet, put her under anesthesia, and then stitched her wound up. However, it wasn't until our mother removed the stitches, and Sammi was able to lick the wound unhindered did the wound finally start to scab up.


Quick vote: Dog's Tongue >> Evil Vets. So let us lick you, it'll be good for you!